Runner

Can you imagine if stars only happened only once every fifty years? We would all probably just stand outside, staying up all night to watch them. We would soak them up with awe.

When I run they are always there though, so instead of peering curiously at them, I let them peer down at me. I focus on my ragged breathing - in through my nose, out through my mouth. I focus on the rhythm of the music pounding in my ears and try to keep my feet in tempo, even when my legs are aching.

I adore running on the snow, where my feet are the first feet to ever fall. It makes me feel like an explorer of a new fantastic world. I feel like an astronaut on the moon - "one small step for man..."

I think that if I could run to the moon, I would. If I could run all the way to the stars up in sky then I would. And once I was there, in distance space on my star, I would turn around to look at the earth. Imagine seeing earth for the first time in your life like that like a cut out circle from black construction paper. I think I would just stand and stare at it. I would soak up that picture of earth in awe.

Best of Both Worlds

There are two separate worlds that I would like to be mine. In one, hot fresh bagels crispy from toasting, come in crisp paper bags. It is trendy and sleek and new age. Everything is clean cut and artsy in this world .I have rows and rows of Staedler stainless steel mechanical drafting pencils and 100 shades of pens.

I walked out of Au Bon Pain - the only decent bakery in Thailand - with my bagel and cold milk in a trendy plastic bag with a compartment for each food item. As someone who once spent an hour looking through a package design book, after walking 4 miles to get to the graphic design bookstore, I have to appreciate the genius of their packaging.

I like this world with toasted bagels and trendy bags. I like my artsy world, where everything comes in neat packages. Crisp. That is what it is. The crisp folds of paper and the crispiness of my bagel. I can see myself staying, here, in this place and being deliriously happy.

I could create in this world. I could draw out the designs and manufacture the trendy bags. I could have a CD rack, filled with CD's organized by genre or color of the case or birthday of the artist. I could have a stereo system and a Macbook. I could have sausages with mehindi patterns on them in the fridge.


But there is another place that I would like to be. A place where there are still bagels - I don't think I could exist anywhere without bagels - but maybe not toasted. I think back one year from this day. Last Summer, I was in Canada, at camp. For ten beautiful days I canoed, hiked, rock climbed, swam and carried everything I needed on my back, with 9 other incredible friends.

If I could, I would stretch those ten days out for a life time. I would leave in the bug bites, the rattle snakes and even the thunderbox - the dreaded camp toilet.

I want that too. Big skys, bare feet and grungy clothes. I want to also keep that joy.